Four Indian Weddings in Vienna — and Why No Two Are Alike

How long it takes depends entirely on which ceremonies come with it. For Rosemary & Harman, it is three days with a total of 19 hours of coverage. On the first day at Gleis 21 in Vienna, Haldi, Mehndi, Sangeet and Madhuramveppu follow one another, with around 50 guests. Haldi is the ceremony in which turmeric paste is applied to skin and clothing. Mehndi is the painting of hands with henna. Sangeet is the evening of dancing. Madhuramveppu — also written Madhuram Veppu — is the ritual feeding of the bride by relatives. The second day brings the registry office in Mödling, with about 30 guests, and a visit to the Gurdwara, the Sikh house of worship — booked by their witnesses as a gift. On the third day comes the symbolic ceremony outdoors in Schlosspark Laxenburg, with around 100 guests. The other three weddings condense everything into a single day. Minu & Nobin celebrate for 12 hours, from the ceremony at Pfarrkirche St. Elisabeth to the reception at ThirtyFive. Tony & Savitha also need 12 hours, from the Jesuit Church to the Hilton Am Stadtpark, with 250 guests. Engla & Leyon stay at Weinschloss Thaller for both the civil ceremony and a short church ceremony, with 150 guests. Both approaches work. The difference is not how much happens each day, but whether the pre-wedding rituals get a day of their own.

Legally, the civil ceremony is the actual marriage — and yet at these weddings it is the shortest and most matter-of-fact part. Where it sits determines how everything else falls into place around it.

For Rosemary & Harman it takes up the second day. Between the pre-wedding rituals at Gleis 21 and the symbolic ceremony in Schlosspark Laxenburg, the two stand with their witnesses in front of the registrar at Mödling registry office, with around 30 guests. Coming after a day of Haldi, Mehndi, Sangeet and Madhuramveppu with 50 guests, and ahead of a day with 100, this small gathering is the calm centre of the three days.

For Engla & Leyon at Weinschloss Thaller, the civil ceremony falls on the same day as the short church ceremony with the thali necklace. Here it is not a day of its own but the prelude to the ceremony under the pavilion, with 150 guests. The two weddings have only one thing in common: the civil ceremony needs its own slot in the schedule, even if it takes very little time itself.

Yes — and Rosemary & Harman's second day proves it. The visit to the Gurdwara was not part of the original plan. It came later, as a gift from their witnesses, and was booked as an add-on.

It ended up on the same day as the registry office in Mödling, so the second day held two very different moments: the brief civil ceremony in front of the registrar, and the visit to the Gurdwara, where Rosemary in a red lehenga and Harman in a white sherwani bow while the guests sit on the red carpet. A schedule spread over several days, in other words, is never quite fixed — as long as a day has some breathing room, there is space for another ceremony.

The rituals depend on the families' region and faith. Tony & Savitha combine South Indian and Christian elements at the Jesuit Church and Hilton Am Stadtpark. During the ceremony, the groom ties the thali necklace around the bride's neck — a necklace that marks her as married — and then hands her the Manthrakodi, a red cloth that is draped around her. Both are South Indian Christian rites that do not appear in any of the other three weddings. Engla & Leyon also have a thali ceremony, but without the Manthrakodi and in a different setting: under a pavilion at Weinschloss Thaller, as a short church ceremony after the civil one. Rosemary & Harman have neither Thali nor Manthrakodi, but instead the pre-wedding rituals Haldi, Mehndi, Sangeet and Madhuramveppu, which none of the other three include. Minu & Nobin focus on the church ceremony at Pfarrkirche St. Elisabeth and the subsequent reception. Each wedding has its own rites, and none of the four overlaps completely with another.

Two weddings of 250 guests, one of 150, one of 100 — and none of these numbers tells you how a celebration feels. That comes down to the venue.

Minu & Nobin celebrate with around 250 guests at ThirtyFive above the rooftops of Vienna, taking over an entire floor of the tower, at long tables with views across the city. Tony & Savitha also have 250 guests, but at Hilton Am Stadtpark, at round tables in a large ballroom. Same number, two venues, two completely different evenings.

Engla & Leyon celebrate with 150 guests at Weinschloss Thaller, where the courtyard under string lights becomes the dance floor and the couple look down from the balcony onto the tables below. Rosemary & Harman invite around 100 guests to the symbolic ceremony at Schlosspark Laxenburg and celebrate afterwards in the Baroque hall of Conference Center Laxenburg, under crystal chandeliers. Over their three days, the numbers keep changing: around 50 guests at Gleis 21, 30 at Mödling registry office, 100 in Laxenburg. Every one of these venues gets loud, colourful and full of family — the venue only decides whether the party goes up, out or into the courtyard.

For photography and film, light is what sets one venue apart from another most clearly. Each of these weddings had its own lighting conditions.

ThirtyFive is flooded with light because Minu & Nobin take over an entire floor of the tower; by evening, the city fills the windows. Conference Center Laxenburg is very bright during the day and, for Rosemary & Harman's evening, relies on its own ambient lighting. Hilton Am Stadtpark was well lit throughout Tony & Savitha's wedding.

Weinschloss Thaller had plenty of daylight for Engla & Leyon; in the evening the courtyard gets mixed lighting, which we balance with spotlights. And at Mödling registry office the daylight is good once the ceiling lights are switched off — otherwise two colour temperatures mix on faces in the ceremony room.